Rantology: Having Fun

So the other day I caught myself turning on my XBox One for the first time since I had moved back in April, and while I admit it did take me a shameful amount of time to turn it back on and play it again, I don't regret me decision.  See, I've actually been keeping plenty busy on my other consoles lately, with Mario Kart 8 coming out on switch, Destiny starting their Age of Triumph celebrations (of which I still need to finish off my record book), and other assorted titles filling out the rest of my time with a sprinkling of WoW just to keep me in check.  Now, that's not to say that I regret my decision to have not turned on my console, but I feel I have neglected it for too long.  That being said I loaded up some Halo 5: Guardians, and just dived into my favorite new game mode Warzone Firefight.

Now Warzone Firefight launched sometime last summer, and while I was fully aware of its release, I was too busy playing other games at the time, I don't remember what games, but it was something I kinda wrote off as something I'd get to later, Well now that later has arrived and dear god I don't know what took me so long.  The game mode is absolutely brilliant in all the right ways, the usage of REQs, the team based goal oriented combat, in fact the only negative thing I can say about it is that respawn timers can get too long late in the game, but even that is offset by the weapons you've unlocked to that point.  However, as much fun as I was having I felt dirty for enjoying my time with the game.  I felt like I was somehow degrading myself for playing a game so many fans disliked, a game that was criticized for the removal of local coop so it could achieve a smooth 60 fps, and I will fully admit I was one of those dissenters at first, yet, as the Halo nutjob I am, went out and purchased Halo 5 at launch and at least gave it a shot, and while I like the direction the story went, despite some of its previous misgivings in Halo 4.  As dirty as I felt though, I just didn't care because at my core I was actually having fun.

See that's something that I feel like people have lost sight on in recent years, especially when it comes to gaming.  We all want this huge awesome new IP to launch with open world, and crafting, and all these other things to give us freedom in our worlds because a handful of games did it well and we're constantly under the illusion that that is where success lays, but I've come to disagree with that and instead I put forth a new idea: instead of chasing the heels of previous success, or criticizing something for every graphical misgiving, or a person for their taste, let's just all have fun.  It's really not that difficult of a concept to embrace, all you need to do is if you see someone enjoying something you don't, just ignore it, let it go.  Don't tell them you hate it, don't tell them why it's bad, don't criticize it for what it is or isn't, let them enjoy something.

Oddly enough this isn't the first time I've found myself in this situation either, with many releases over the last couple of years I've found myself either having to defend my interest in the game, justify why I would ever play such a thing, or I've just felt ashamed for playing something that I am genuinely having fun playing simply because the gaming community as a whole dislikes it for whatever reason.  A couple of very recent examples are Mass Effect Andromeda and Ghost Recon Wildlands.  It would be no small secret to the people who know me that I am a HUGE Mass Effect fan, I have art on my walls, clothing in my drawers, hell I even splurged on the $130 Pathfinder backpack, $100 DieCast Nomad ND1, and I'm currently in the middle of purchasing the FigPins.  Needless to say, I LOVE Mass Effect, it's wonderful and I practically disappeared when Andromeda came out this year, starting the game a mere week and a half before I moved, whilst packing mind you.  I loved the game, and had a ton of fun playing it, and while there were things I was looking forward to that weren't there, such as dynamic outposts, being able to land on dozens of worlds, and a larger selection of romantic options.  All those put aside I still enjoyed the game, and had hours of fun playing it despite having to defend my interest in the game due to its glitches and facial animations, both issues that in my playthrough were a maximum of  maybe 30 minutes in a 50 hour experience.

I felt assaulted and wronged because how dare I have fun when a few people put videos on YouTube for reddit and other meta sites to laugh at and criticize the game for it. How dare I enjoy something that let down their expectations, people who didn't play the game and had no interest in it in the first place.  How dare I have fun.  How dare I enjoy myself.  The same issue revolves around Ghost Recon Wildlands.  The reviews came out for it and were less than positive, the game was repetitive, the open world felt like it made the player travel vast amounts for no real reason, and the narrative is too shallow, but I found myself in the same place, having fun.  I've enjoyed my time with Ghost Recon, I love taking down bases, getting into firefights driving around Bolivia, flying up as high as I can and parachuting back down to Earth.  I'm loving every minute of it and I've actually been putting off completing it because I don't want it to be over.

Yet it was in a PSN group chat that I realized I shouldn't feel bad for enjoying something, if its fun then why should I care what people say about it? Lately we've all been obsessing over review scores and graphical improvement, and making sure that everything is tippy toppy to the point that anything but the very best isn't good enough.  People complained about Arkham Knight's graphical and game play issues, but I still had fun, I may have been frustrated at points, but I enjoyed the ride through the game.  People complained about Destiny and it's lack of story content and it's MMO-esque approach to gameplay, yet here we are almost 3 years later with the sequel getting ready to release and new players are joining every day, something must be keeping those players coming back. Another much criticized game over its lifetime is World of Warcraft, being one of the largest games of all time leading up to the 2010 release of Cataclysm that rebuilt the world from the ground up and saw many players straight up leave the game after being so invested for so long, other games stepped in place to acquire some of it's player base like Rift, SWtOR, Guild Wars 2, and more recently Final Fantasy XIV.  Yet many remained loyal to the game for a myriad of reasons, even throughout the Warlords of Draenor expansion, which some refer to as "The Dark Days of WoW".  Yet still, the rush of getting new equipment, enjoyment of friends, and conquering bosses still remained fun to players to world over, these players didn't leave because they were still enjoying themselves in one way or another.

Now none of this is to say we should be happy and content with whatever the industry hands us and just "be grateful we're getting games", but we certainly shouldn't talk down on someone who enjoys something.  As a long time fan of the Koei's Warrior franchise I know very well what a double sided dose of criticism looks like.  It takes a certain sense of mindless grinding to get any sort of real enjoyment out of those games, but that doesn't mean it's impossible, in fact sometimes a mindless grind is exactly what I need to destress after a long day, I find it relaxing and fun, so what.  We all got into this insane hobby around the central idea that games and gaming is fun.  No one started off day one out of the gate as being the best and min maxing every character to be the mathematical best at whatever, we all have our own unique playstyles, and our own unique approaches to everything, so why should our enjoyment be any different. Gaming takes all types, some like graphics, some like stories, some like mechanics, some like to min max and feel powerful, some are just tournament players who dedicate everything they have to being the best at their game, and that's all okay.

I guess what I'm getting at here is that we need to stop getting into petty arguments and judging each other.  We need to sit down and just appreciate gaming a bit more, appreciate gaming for what it is, something we have fun with.  Not everything needs to be an artistic masterpiece, not everything needs to appeal to everything, glitches happen, and someone is going to disagree with you about Ubisofts Spiderman game on PS4, but who cares.  What really matters is that you're having fun, and if you see someone enjoying something you don't like here's a little piece of advice: don't attack them for it (unless of course that thing is discriminatory in any way that is), they're people like you. Let people have fun.

Rantology: Let's talk about this whole Hainly Abrams thing.

It's finally here, Mass Effect Andromeda, the game that I've been waiting and drooling for ever since Mass Effect 3 ended and the online community had died down after the PS4 and XB1 had launched.  Full of all of its fame and glory, the series first title on the next generation of consoles is exciting, fresh, and.....oh shit BioWare went and done fucked up didn't they?  Great, now we have an elephant in the room for my favorite video game franchise, and it's not exactly a well behaved one at that.  For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about you've either been living under a rock, not phased by Mass Effect Andromeda coming out, or just not paying attention to about any sort of game journalism at all, I'm a little jealous of all of you in a different form, because this has become quite tiresome honestly.

So, backstory for those of you who don't know a recently published Polygon article broke down and discussed three example of transgender characters in three different recent AAA titles.  Now normally this is something I'd just put aside and continue playing my game, but I feel like this time around it's worth bringing up as a point of discussion as the industry continues to grow and evolve into something greater.  While the main focus of this will be breaking down Mass Effect Andromeda and Hainly Abrams, I will be touching on Horizon and Zelda as well just for posterity.

Hainly Abrams is a character that you, Ryder/Pathfinder, encounter rather early into the the new Mass Effect game on Eos after you establish the first settlement there.  Her role is minor at best, being the chief researcher on the base she has a handful of lines of dialogue, and a couple of small go here do that quests too.  So she's a VERY small character in the entire game, which literally has multiple planets and dozen of characters that are like her.  Now, and here comes my favorite phrase, THAT HAVING BEEN SAID, that doesn't mean that BioWare expressed her in a positive manner.

She feels like she was added a checkbox character, who does little to draw you in a build a better connection with, and is simply there as a "hey, we have a transgender character" kind of thing, which, if done in a careful manner, isn't necessarily a bad thing, showing their audience that inclusiveness is key and everyone is welcome.  However Hainly just had to get it out there right away for the sake of getting it out there.  To clarify this is done by a common question in the game that everybody asks each other "Why did you come to Andromeda."  Her answer was simple, even if jarringly insensitive to the transgender community, simply saying she wanted to come so she could be who she was, and not stuck in a lab being tortured by people dead-naming her, and while this isn't her exact dialogue you get the idea.

This could have come from any number of different reasons on BioWare's end, maybe an intern brought it up and some slack jawed writer threw her in because they felt it was a good idea and didn't put too much thought into.  But that doesn't excuse the lack of effort that went into her expose, and personally I'd rather they just kind have left it out all together, or bring it up in a different manner, like by maybe making the transgender character part of your crew and something you learn about over the course of the game as you become more and more connected with them they eventually come to confide in Ryder about this to help them solve a personal issue, which could be a number of things that I'm not even going to speculate.  That would be an infinitely better way to handle this issue instead of just blurting it out there for all to see.

Now, this wouldn't be a Rantology if I didn't at least offer a bit of a different perspective on it, and while I'm doing this I would like to remind people who do read this that I'm not trying to be insensitive, unfriendly, or unsupportive of transgender individuals, but I'm simply trying to make some sort of bizarre sense of , if there is some sort, the deeper purpose here (though my money is on just some junior level writer didn't do their homework).  This is surprising, to say the least, especially from the same company that is responsible for Krem who is not only one of the best representations of how to appropriately handle a transgender character, but also respect their boundaries as well.

You see with Krem it's not a one and done conversation with him to learn about his past, he slowly confides in you as you and Iron Bull grow closer over the course of the game, and a lot of the conversation is more focused around him finding people to accept him and not caring about people who don't.  When the inquisitor asks Iron Bull about this his response is actually really simple: Krem is a man and deserves to be treated like the man he is.  It's not such a matter of the inquisitor trying to learn of Krem's past, and Krem doesn't just go out and instantly tell you his story, in fact the only reason you learn it is by asking Iron Bull of his past, and by extension, the Chargers.  Krem is a rare shining light for diverse characters in an industry widely populated by sex symbols, innuendos, chain mail bikinis, and genuine misunderstanding about the representations of sex, gender, and identity in both workplace and expression.

Speaking to the genuine misunderstanding, two other games that are mentioned in the article, and I honestly feel that the author misunderstood both of them.  In Breath of the Wild Link is tasked with entering Gerudo Village, but there is an issue, they only allow in men stating that "This is a town of vai, not voe are allowed".  In order to remedy this you hear a rumor of a man who managed to sneak in to the town and find two individuals looking for him, one outside the town says he travels between the town and previous outpost, and when you find the man looking for him he is confused as to his location but hints the Gerudo at the market talking of a Hylian vai, you later find him on the roof of the market where he insists you use female pronouns and if you do will offer to sell you an outfit, and after purchasing it and equipping it the wind picks up and flashes his beard.

Now, some of you may be wondering why I'm using "he/him", well simply put it's because this character isn't a progressive stance that some have claimed him to be, not he is instead a joke by Nintendo at the notion of transgender individuals by taking a the bathroom example, a Conservative favorite, to its most extreme, or a pervert dressing as a women to get a peek at an all women town.  His insistence on female pronouns only exists to further his guise and continue to be allowed into Gerudo Village.  People have tried to convince me it is a joke at the Gerudos for being unable to identify the difference between genders in other cultures, but this is proven wrong as both the chief and her bodyguard recognize Link as male.  See all of this was most likely done to reflect upon Japans strict principles of gender roles and stereotypes and the overwhelming backlash to the reaction to the reduction of a female link in Breath of the Wild.  This was a major punch-down by Nintendo, and quite honestly something it feels like is overlooked in many eyes because of 1) it gives you "sexy Link", and 2) Zelda is released so infrequently people are willing to overlook these things and give Nintendo/Zelda a pass.

See as much as people want to give Nintendo and Zelda a pass on something like this for a variety of reasons including what I have argued before of Zelda being a "golden game" (can do no wrong), but the truth is often much darker, and while I can only speculate intentions, knowing the culture and companies history gives me a very good idea.  Similarly Horizon Zero Dawn seemed to receive some flak from the article for reasons that I just can't tell?  Honestly I'm having a tough time really understanding trying to understand the point the author took here in her article.  Part of me wants to say she didn't like it but then she goes on to say that Janeva was a significant character in the game and an overall positive for trans inclusion, though didn't like the social norms imposed on the character.

While all of this is understandable frustrating I think the takeaway, from Aloy's perspective at least, is that this is a completely new situation and she has never encountered someone like him before, so her instincts were to refer to him as her.  This seems so appalling to us because our society has overcome these hurdles already and we have a level of social acceptance in the matter.  We know to respect someones gender identity and expression, Aloy doesn't.  Despite the game taking place in the future she has no idea about even the first thing to think in a situation like this.  In our society we completely understand what is and isn't appropriate because we've had these discussions, we've sat down and talked about what is and isn't alright, Aloy hasn't.  Aloy, in all honesty, has been too busy fighting for her right to live and exist her entire life to be able to stop and think about it, and while part of me really wants to sit down and really hammer and nail it into Guerilla about how they approached this topic in Horizon and how they could have been more sensitive about it...I just can't.

I totally understand why this is the case, effectively they're living in a world where everyday is a literal fight to survive the machines and struggles of dealing with the fallout from the older empire.  None of it is easy, and this is such a rare occurrence because of the perceived social implications in their society and I think that's what Guerilla was trying to get at.  The fact that we didn't just arrive at this point of acceptance overnight, and at our core we still have instincts and urges and it's our social doctrine that really overcomes them.  I'm not trying to say that people who are transgender aren't natural or aren't validated, but instead we all have base perceptions about the world around us that, because of our social advancements, can subconsciously control.  So while Aloy doesn't exactly stand on the pinnacle of how to treat transgender individuals, she's not meant to.

Janeva on the other hand is exactly what the industry needs right now though, yes he is surrounded by a strict set of social doctrine that dictates how men and women act, but at the same point in time he is just as, if not more, capable than any other man in the Carja army.  He rose through the ranks with skill and determination set out to show the world he is who he says he is.  While he is surrounded by an air that doesn't explicitly state he is transgender, the connotations and subtext is there, and to add to it he states that he is a soldier, even going so far as saying "No woman can wear Carja armor".  He stands firm to his identity and his loyalty to the Carja, because honestly he could have just as easily just been like, well fuck it, I'm not going to deal with this, and peaced out.

Really what should we take from all of this?  Well honestly its that the gaming industry still has a REALLY long way to go when it comes to being able to appropriately handle gender identity and gender representation.  Additionally we need to be able to take a more objective look and understand intentions of these topics, because quite frankly things are getting either lost in translation or outright forgiven due to the series or media its in.  Mass Effect handled it wrong, Zelda handled it wrong, Horizon handled it...differently, it's hard to say, and Dragon Age did fantastic.  I'm not going to pretend to have all the answers, but I sure as hell can hopefully provide an insightful look onto some of the most recent bits of social commentary on these games.  Till next time.

Horizon Zero Dawn vs The Legend Zelda Breath of the Wild

Okay, so this is a bit of an odd situation here.  We have two games being released 2 days apart from one another, on completely different consoles, and they're not only similar, but they're both HIGHLY anticipated.  So how do we handle that?  Well its simple.  I played both games for roughly 20 hours each, and while I fully admit 20 hours isn't nearly enough to give to either game, it is enough for me to get a good sense of the gameplay and flow for the game.  So I may not be able to tell you how the story turned out or what kind of long term impression I had, I feel I can still give somewhat of a good opinion on the differences between these two titles.  Now, this may be a little late to the party, but I feel that since these two are so close that comparing the two would be kinda fun.  So with that said lets start off with Horizon because it came out first and it comes first alphabetically, oh and raisins.

Oh, I also want everyone to know this is not going to be a spoiler free comparison either, as I will be discussing my actions through the game as I go on.

Starting off my time with Horizon: Zero Dawn was both an awe inspiring and frustrating event.  I was one of a handful of players who experienced a cinematic crash during the games opening when Rost is carrying a baby Aloy to her naming ceremony, an traditional ceremony where a child of the Nora is given their name.  Turns out, I had to restart my system and let my game finish updating and installing first.  To be safe I deleted my saves and I was off to journey through the fascinating, frightening, and fantastic machine filled world of Horizon: Zero Dawn.  As I started the game I was introduced to Aloy, our protagonist, and Rost, her mentor, a pair of exiled Nora who lived on their own outside of the society that had shunned them for life.  Aloy, longing for existence, is scared off and falls into ruins of the old world where she finds herself a 'Focus', an ancient artifact that allows her to see the weaknesses and detect machines. Doomed to a lonely existence Rost teaches Aloy the ways of the hunt after an encounter with Nora villagers not only scars Aloy, but also leaves her asking the question of why.  Why is she outcast?  Why does she not have a mother?  And why do the others treat her this way?  Determined to find these answers she turns to Rost to teach her.

As she grows and learns the ways of the Nora hunters she takes part in the Nora tradition of the Proving to earn her way back into Nora society and to win the favor of the Matriarchs so that she may discover her past.  However the Proving is attacked by people who see Aloy as a threat.  Before the proving I assumed a number of tasks to help citizens of Nora, or outcasts around the small valley you have access to, some of these were simple small machine hunts, or gathering supplies. I learned the basics of Horizon: Zero Dawn's simple, yet impressive stealth mechanics, and how to most effectively hunt both machines and animals for the resources necessary to not only survive, but thrive in the hostile world.  You see, not only are you up against the machines, but you are also competing against an ever demanding inventory and item management.  You need to be careful when encountering a fight to be as efficient as possible as you are limited in your inventory and must constantly be crafting additional arrows, traps, and potions in order to survive.  This is something I'd normally find repulsive in a game, but the simplicity that Horizon allows me to do it, and while still staying in combat, even if I need to make arrows, is something that doesn't actually interrupt Horizons fast paced and honestly addictive combat.

As I progressed through the story, acquired a tripcaster and fire arrows I was ready for my first challenge, hunting a fearsome Sawtooth.  At this point I had little understanding of the games trap mechanics, and monster luring/AI potential so I foolishly rushed in to a fight I was unprepared for, and while I survived it taught me two valuable lessions: 1) Use stealth and my focus to my absolute advantage, and 2) when encountering a machine for the first time prepare for the fight as if you will not win unless you use every trick in your arsenal.  I barely managed to survive my encounter, but with reinforced will and determination I was ready for much larger hunts.  I won't really be saying much about the proving, but to say that it is your first time encountering human enemies, which have the potential to be much more deadly simply because they have the ability to not only attack, but also overpower you at range, so you must use your environment to your advantage.

It was after this I had my first taste of real answers though, even if they weren't exactly the ones I was looking for.  I awoke to find myself in the most sacred place of the Nora, where only Matriarchs may reside, but I was told that I was birthed from the mountain the Nora live on, not exactly the answers I wanted, but it was a start.  I also learned that I was the spitting image of a woman who lived over 1000 years prior, but with the door to where I came from sealed shut I was unable to gather the few answers I needed more, so I was appointed the rank of Seeker, and sent outside of Nora lands to uncover the truth of my place in the world, and the past of the "Old Ones" (the humans who created the machines).  However, not all was at peace for long, for the humans who attacked us also had a way to corrupt machines into fighting for them.  Most machines are programmed to either run from people, or engage them.  Well an overridden machine will fight with the humans who overrode it. So as I was leaving, I encountered my first true test, The Corrupter, a 3 legged terror that could launch grenades, throw rocks, and target missiles at me from a decent range.  Remember about how I said to be prepared, well I was not.  An interesting fight against a highly mobile target I learned the true tenacity of these enemies, and understood them as an incredible threat.

After a draining fight that took almost all of my healing resources from me, and completing the main quest line I decided to spend my accumulated skill points on a few character upgrades.  While Horizon does offer skill trees, it does so in a manner that is both unique and rewarding.  These trees are broken down into stealth, combat, and resource gathering.  I decided the most important thing was upgrading my healing abilities and to take full advantage of stealth by increasing the damage my silent strikes did. Additionally after this fight Aloy was determined to find out how these machines could be corrupted, thus unlocking the override ability.  The first real taste of overpowering machines.  So with my new toy in hand I set out to mount my first machine and explore the larger world around me.

After leaving the relative safety of home, and setting out into the brave new world, I was eager to discover what awaited me.  It turns out, more than I could have ever wanted.  From journeying to assist the Nora war party to get revenge, to my first experiences with Horizon's Assassins Creed esque Tallneck, which allows Aloy to have access to local map information eincluding outposts, locations of campfires (and fast travel locations), and machine locations too.  While it's not especially unique, they all have a unique challenge when it comes to climbing them as you can't directly jump on to them, but instead need to find some sort of cliff to reach their back first. Continuing on my journey, in a completely unprompted move, I reached and started to explore what is called a Cauldron, or a factory where machines are made.  These Cauldrons offer unique challenges that pit you against patrolling machines and a boss fight of sorts, the rewards at the end is an upgrade to your Override ability that lets you control the machines related to that Cauldron.

Shortly after conquering the Cauldron, I decided to reinvigorate my exploration and push on through the main story to the wondrous city of Meridan.  Meridan is the home of the Carja, a tribe who worships the sun and believes their king to be the suns will on Earth.  This is where I got sidetracked from the main questline.  You see, when you get here a few things are revealed to you about the attack on Nora, so naturally I decided that was important to me and off I went to save the day.  Well, it turns out that randomly running off can be a bit of a bad idea as you need to be careful, or fast, around the map because bigger machines are not afraid to flex their muscles to defend their territory, and random patrols of humans, both friendly and non, are wandering almost at what seems every turn.  Also, one of my favorite little mini quests: the bandit camps.  As you travel you meet people, well one of them is looking to kill bandits who show up.  Part of the trick to this is not going in arrows flying, but instead taking a more stealthy approach because if you alert them they will sound the alarm which will only bring in reinforcements and make your life miserable.  But after clearing three camps I was back at my quest to attack the Shadow Carja who attacked Nora, a missions which proved most fruitful.

Towards the end of my time with Horizon I decided my life would be remiss without at least trying to get some collectibles, and while most of these have the standard open world feel to them, they are also not as simple as run over here and grab this because you often will either have to fight, or sneak your way to your objective, or complete climbing challenges for Banuk statues.  These minor changes added a refreshing approach to the dreary monotony of open world sandbox games like this, and Horizon is a true treat, and a real charmer.  And while I did take on one more mission, I won't go into details as it does contain major plot spoilers to reveal some of the events of the past, but suffice it to say I left the mission hungry for knowledge of what the events I was mission were.  Horizon: Zero Dawn is a true blessing in a modern era of dry shooters, overzealous indy games, franchise circlejerks, and ultimately lackluster RPGs.  The few minor issues and complaints I have about the game are vastly overshadowed by the areas the game excels in far better than I could have even hoped for.

As I said earlier, Horizon: Zero Dawn, and The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild are games that use similar mechanics at their core, but execute them in vastly different ways.  While Horizon takes open world elements and revitalizes them in refreshing and truly remarkable new ways, Zelda....doesn't.

To start off Zelda to me was nothing if not interesting.  Not only did I play it on the Switch, but I also haven't properly sat down with a Zelda game since Wind Waker came out the first time.  That being said, I did do plenty of preparation for this Zelda to make sure I knew what I was getting into, and some areas just fell short.

I'd like to start off by saying though Breath of the Wild is a good game, it's just not a great game, and while it does give the Switch a strong leg to stand on, I feel as if that leg could use a bit of help.  The art, design, and music are all a wonderful change, everything feels fresh and reinvigorated, a wonderful new world to explore all over again.  However this beautiful world is also ripe with imperfections and poor design choices.  One of my biggest complaints with the game is that tons of game areas, and subsequently large portions of the map are just open areas with little to do or explore.  I found myself in some places traveling a large portion of Hyrule regretting my decision to not take a horse, or running aimlessly with a world that seemed hardly alive and breathing.  Yet I digress.

The game begins with Link waking from a 100 year slumber to the ruins of Hyrule from a battle with Gannon, and a has yet to recover.  You find an old hermit who lives isolated on a plateau where you have been stranded as well.  He reveals to you that you have been asleep for a long time and suggests that you start out by using your Sheikah Slate to learn of the area by attaching it to a console in the valley, doing so not only reveals the map, but also raises a series of shrines on the plateau as well.  These shrines are like mini dungeons, the first 4 give you abilities that you will use to solve puzzles through the game.  The old man requires you to solve 4 of them on the plateau before he will give you his glider so you can leave safely.

After completing this he reveals he is the former king of Hyrule and that his daughter, Zelda, has been trapped in a 100 year battle with Gannon and that it is up to you to save her.  More or less you can go right for him and get pwned, or you can go through and free the 4 great beasts (machines) from his control.  These machines were created by ancient hylians to fight Gannon when he eventually returned, but he corrupted them and killed their chosen champion (each race has a champion to pilot the great beast), and wounded Link, but Zelda locked him away to restore his powers.

After learning all of this I set out to free the beasts and arbitrarily headed to the bottom right one first (which I guess is the one you're supposed to go to) in the Zora domain.  Before this however you are tasked with learning a bit more about what all happened from Impa and about the Sheikah slates, which is interesting and can provide some good insight into the story and the world around Link.  Really what you learn is that the Sheikah is ancient technology designed alongside the great beasts and the whole store of reincarnation and fighting Gannon that Zelda is known for.  Also you find out that no one is really working with Gannon this time around, like yea some people just don't like Link, but no one wants Gannon to succeed.

So anyrate I was off to the Zora domain to...and I died.  Death happens in Zelda, a lot.  So save often, which isn't an issue since saving is only a couple of buttons away at all times.  But that doesn't make it less annoying.  After reloading and going around the stupid Guardian in my way I met the Zora prince, who tasked me with the long long walk to the top of the mountain to the Zora domain where it was perpetually raining.  So off I went.  This is where the artificial size comes into play, pretty much a whole section of the map was brought down to being just a canyon and a lake.  Normally not a problem, but for a game that touted its size at every turn it really doesn't do the game any favors.  After arriving at my destination I am greeted in a less than positive way as you learn the princess Mipha disappeared after falling in love with a Human (Link), so they have been more or less banned from entry.

Well you are recognized by the King who makes an exception, telling you that it is up to you to set things straight and that you must calm the great beast (a giant elephant) and stop it from constantly making rain as not to drown the rest of Hyrule.   First, however, you must gather lighting arrows from a giant lion who really doesn't want to share.  This part was kind of annoying as it was a stealth section that required you gather arrows from trees and grass while avoiding an enemy that could literally detect you through stone, which wasn't fun. After a couple of tries however I managed to get the arrows and it was time to take on the dungeon.  I was tasked with riding on a Zoras back, and using these arrows to disable these engines on top of the elephants shoulders to stop the water flow, after completing this four times the main "dungeon" was unlocked.  Calling it a dungeon really doesn't justify it, what you need to do is sync your Zelda Switch (Sheikah Slate, as that's pretty much what it is) to these terminals to unlock the master terminal and fight Ganons corruption to free it.

After a successful battle you are treated to the happy go lucky cutscene where all is now right and well in the Zora domain, and the king invites you back anytime.  My original intentions were to travel counter clockwise from there, so naturally I headed North, to my certain doom.  This is the Goron realm (and apparently the suggested 4th because its the hardest too).  So much surpirse to me on my climb that I literally catch on fire, so I tossed that notion out of my mind and turned right around to regear myself, open my guide, and find out where the hell to go.  Turns out I needed to go clockwise to the Gerudo instead.  So off we went.

As I arrived there I found out 2 things, 1 the desert is hot, and 2, I needed some new clothes, unfortunately though before I could set out to get my sexy Link outfit my time with Zelda for the purposes of this review had come to an end.  Parts of it were frustrating, like the vast openness of some areas, yet the artificial size of others, and the seemingly impossible random mobs that would show up for almost no reason.  But other parts were more than enjoyable like the vast array of colorful characters.  I still believe that Zelda would benefit from the addition of a leveling system to reenforce some of those RPG elements that it seems to be teetering on, and a more well thought out crafting system that it so desperately craves to have with the new weapon system, from braking from killing 3 enemies to be replaced by a useless weapon the enemy was holding was not enjoyable and made me want to preserve my more powerful weapons for the inevitable boss fights that never came.

There you have it folks, the two compared, and because this is a review I will give my ratings down here.  The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild scores 8.5 great beasts out 10, because while refreshing for Zelda, it is full of tired tropes that we have seen all too often elsewhere, and if it weren't for the wonderful characters and great storytelling it wouldn't have scored this high.  Horizon Zero Dawn on the other gets 9.5 terrifying Thunderjaws out of 10.  This is a true exemplar of a game with very few and minor inconsistencies, Aloy is a wonderful character that you can help but get attached to.  I hope people find this helpful and informative, next up is Mass Effect.

Rantology: How Nintendo can make the Switch succeed

Ugh, so this really kinda makes me mad, I've been telling myself to stick to reviews and not get into opinion pieces about how the gaming industry can improve itself, but wouldn't you know it Nintendo had to go out, announce the Switch, and make me go back on my word to myself.  Well God-fucking-dammit, if I can't catch a break here we go again.  This is something I like to call Rantology, in other words me spewing on about a subject for who the hell knows how long trying to make it as funny as possible while hopefully offering a potential fix that the gaming industry is then able to use free of charge (though a few free games wouldn't hurt).  So buckle up kids, we're about to get dirty and possibly shove our face in something we really want nothing apart of.

On January 12th Nintendo did a full reveal of their Nintendo Switch, the successor to the shit-laden thrown of the WiiU.   And boy, was it a train wreck.  Now the hardware looks solid and has a solid idea behind it.  A home gaming console you can take with you and play with your friends on the go.  I love it, purely and simply this is the kind of idea that put Nintendo on the top back in the 90's.  Now their execution of it during their live stream, well lets just say embarrassing barely does it justice.  Nintendo fucked up this conference in the only way that Nintendo possibly could have, and now, we have to hope and pray that Nintendo can save the Switch from the same fate as the WiiU.

Well what happened to the WiiU you ask?  Well sit right the fuck down, strap in (and on where appropriate, I don't judge), and get ready for one mild ride.  Ultimately the WiiU failed for being the Wii, but also not being the Wii, and not the PS4 or XB1.  What does that mean?  Well simply put it was something most people saw as something that should have been an expansion for the Wii and not a standalone console.  A tablet that doubles a controller is a really good idea, just not at a $150 price point for a tablet alone, and neither is the idea that only one player can use it, oh and you can't do asymmetrical games with it, oh and it will play original Wii games, but you need to go into an emulator mode, and there's no decent 1st or 3rd party support, and all those old digital games (in the digital fucking era I might add) are getting left out too, and what do you mean its not as powerful as a PS3??????   Yea the WiiU was a let down, and there's really no two ways around that.  Now don't get me wrong I love my WiiU, and Xenoblade Chronicles X is one of my favorite games, but with that being said Nintendo really missed their mark on the console.

What does this mean for Nintendo and the switch?  Well they need to really overcome the failings that happened with the WiiU, or history is doomed to repeat itself, and some of these things, the Nintendo Switch, or what I hope to not have to call it, the Nintendo Shits, is already doomed to do.  First and foremost, the Switch needs to have the same graphic performance as its competitors.  Lets be real, we live in an age of 1080p and 4k, and if you can't AT LEAST hit 1080p in the home (the whole 720p on the go is fine as its a smaller screen and much more reasonable for conservation of battery life) then you need a serious cognitive re calibration (read: kick to the teeth).  Unfortunately, I see Nintendo failing on this aspect.  I don't see them releasing an upgraded dock (for a reasonable price) to upgrade the output to 4k, nor do I see them even making that a priority, which will drive down other areas.

The next HUGE thing Nintendo needs to do, coincidentally, is also the first step of the D.E.N.N.I.S. System: Demonstrate Value.  As if I, the consumer, am one of Dennis' many sexual targets, Nintendo needs to demonstrate their value to me.  And by value I mean justi-fucking-fy the goddamned subscription cost of your online services besides a one month rental of a classic game (that chances are I won't even be able to pick) and just fucking give me like 4 of them.  I mean seriously, how much money will they be out in the long run? Nothing? I mean these games have already made their initial sales when they launched, and most of them don't even hold the replayabilty as they once did due to the limitations of the time when they were made.  Seriously, its not that goddamned hard Nintendo, get your literal head out of your literal ass and give me value in your online subscriptions, or this potentially awesome console or face me not giving you money for them.

Oh, while were on the subject of retro games, I have one more teensy weensy, itsy bitsy request.  *ahem* NINTENDO, IT'S ABOUT FUCKING TIME YOU RELEASE MORE THAN ONE CLASSIC GAME A MONTH.  Seriously.  I can go online right now and get a SNES emulator, and a ROM for each and every game on the system.  For every game that Nintendo holds the rights too for older consoles (and trust me, theres a lot of them) there is zero, zlich, nada, nuffin, none, no reason why they aren't available digitally for a reasonable price (read not $10-$20 and more like $5).  Seriously, unless you want to change the graphics interface looks, in which case you haven't really made a huge effort recently, you have no excuse here.  In fact let me give you one very large reason to do this instead: MONEY.  It will make you money, especially from people like me, who like to play older games sometimes, and have disposable income to purchase them, especially if they aren't $20 for a game I'll play a couple of times for like an hour or two.

Now, this is a big one, and by big I mean huge, like mega huge.  So big it makes yo mama look tiny, and she chased your school bus this morning thinking it was a twinkie.  Third party support.  What does this mean?  Well simply put Nintendo needs to make sure that they not only have 3rd party companies make games for them, but these companies are committed to making games for them.  I mean how much fun is it really if the only games I can play on a Nintendo system are games only Nintendo makes or licenses, and I can't play other huge games like Overwatch, Mass Effect, Batman, and others, all because of Nintendo's dumbass quality control and insistence on the Switch being "family friendly".  Sorry Nintendo, that won't earn you a top place in the current industry.

Finally, and this is probably the biggest, the last thing Nintendo needs to do to make the Switch successful is to not forget about it like we all try to do with our alcoholic, misogynistic, and racist uncles....unless that's just me.  But really, the WiiU fell out of relevancy because Nintendo spent so much time and money on the 3DS that they just kinda forgot it was a thing after pitiful sales and poor release numbers.  With 2 million units preordered world wide Nintendo is looking at a bigger launch than the PS4 and XB1, so they certainly have the momentum, but with some of their release lineups I'm not sure they can last very long out of the gate till we start seeing a good amount of games consistently coming out for it.  Ultimately time will tell, but Nintendo needs to understand that if their sales drop after a month or two, they need not panic, just to commit to their customers and buckle down for the long run.

So really that's it.  I feel like a whore for going back to this whole Rantology thing again, but you know what, I kinda don't care.  Either way the Shits comes squirting out in a month and we'll see how it goes.  Till next time kids.